Innovations in speed dating and matchmaking could even provide the most focused dater with simple tips that could help.
In an interview with a psychologist told us he was always fascinated with the concept of speed dating. While people are making split-second decisions on the feeling of their heart. In the last couple of years, It has gained a lot of popularity all around the world. In New York, there can be found every evening gatherings for it. In 2019 the company Groupon has hosted the world largest speed dating event with over 400 people in a restaurant in Chicago.
Because he was always fascinated with dating process he tried himself as well. While the dating it turns out that he likes to talk often with his dates but as you expected he didn’t find the love of his life.
After the speed dates, he did some reflection of the mistakes he had made. But he knew that he was not the only one who was struggling with this type of dating. Sometimes speed dating events could push you in a sudden way that isn’t working in our favor. To make the best decisions you have to know which ecological environments influences your mindset.
The Science of Romance
Most of the traditional dating was more organized to meet future love in a bar or at a place with the same interest as dancing classes. When you have met the person already in real life it is easier to decide if you like a person or not. Online dating takes more time to meet people in real life because people first want to know the person better and it is not as spontaneous as meeting in real life. The bright side of online dating is that you can meet more people at the same time to see if there is a spark. We could say that online and offline dating both has their pro’s and cons. It provides you with the best combination if you want to find love in real life and still want to a lot of people.
At the typical speed-dating event, the people are sitting at individual tables with two chairs and they rotate every three minutes. Most of the time they have a buzzer to make everyone aware that they have to change seats. At the end of every event, people can submit a note with names to the organizers of the event about which people they would like to get in touch with. They only let you get in touch with each other if you both showed interested.
How often do people get interested?
A study of psychologist Alison P. Lenton from the University of Edinburgh and Marco Francesconi from the University of Essex analyzed over 3700 dating decisions across 84 speed-dating events. They found out that the daters varied a lot in age, height, occupation and educational background and they made fewer dating proposals. These findings were most seen when individuals met a large number of people and most of them didn’t start dating after.
Another study by Lenton and Barbara Fasolo of the London School of Economics and Political Science had indicated that the people who were dating often misjudge because of they met too many people at a short time and this affect their feelings too much. The most important finding was that they didn’t feel an emotional connection with the people because there were too many choices in a short time. Lenton and Francesconi find out with their research that when the number of participants increases people lean more heavily on innate guidelines, known as heuristics, in their decision making.
Currently, Lenton and Fasolo are working on a book about: “How we end up choosing our partners” in the book they judge potential partners by comparing those with others.
Knowing Your Environment
A study from psychologist Dan Ariely of Duke University said when it comes to dating, people could be seen as the “ultimate experience goods”. Within the research, they asked 47 women and men to make a list with the qualities their potential date has to have before start dating. The way someone makes you laugh or how your partner makes you feel good about yourself are the most common.
In a study from Raymond Fisman of the Columbia University and several of his colleagues was found that in a speed dating event people were asked what the potential partners should have as capabilities, both the answers of the people didn’t match. Eventually at the end of the event people said that they found it more attractive than they didn’t match because they are meeting different people they normally don’t meet.
Here are some tips you can use while speed-dating :
1. Don’t be embarrassed
You don’t have to be embarrassed because everyone is here for the same reason and that is meeting new people. Just make sure you are relaxed because you have to make a good impression on the person you only meet a short time.
2. Be ready to talk
Nobody wants to have an awkward silence while the date, make sure you have some topics beforehand that you think are interesting to talk about to know your date better.
Sometimes organizers provide you with a list of questions to warm up with, most of which are pretty horrible and corny. Having your questions is always a better and more unique way.
3. Divide the time
Make sure you talk both equal times if you are talking to an introvert person they could be afraid or nervous and you be the only one that is talking. This is something we don’t want on a date so make sure to divide the time to know each other better.
4. Enjoy your date
One of the most important things is to enjoy the date and don’t take it to serious. You are not going married it is just a date, and if you don’t found anybody it is what it is. But if you had a fun time you still enjoyed your day!
We hope these tips are useful for you en good luck on your first date and remember the date with a smile!